Hate

Do I really need to explain how hate is in manga? In manga a bad ending can create the worst kind of anger. We want happiness, but all we see is that head banging anger. How do we suppress these feeling that make others kill? Do we follow Hulk's advice and say angry or do we find some tranquil peace? Well, unlike most people I have a very big tell and that tell is that when I am mad I cry. Not when I am sad, but when I am angry. It is the very flaw in my somewhat masculine identity. So how do I help you when I have such a big flaw? I do not help at all. At most I can tell you to re-edit your words before you say it. Think about what you are going to say and wait a while until you are sure you want to say it. It may look like you do not have nothing to save, but you are tactical in thinking and can lead in the conversation. I learned to hold my feeling in and try to live out my life in manga, but occurring to others I should not read manga after I become an adult. I became 19 yesterday and nothing changed. I feel more hate for my father, but as would any child that knows that their father is not a father at all. He never raised a child, but he acts like he is the righteous god since I had to stay with him in college. Jobless because of my faults and his, but he never point blame at himself. The sad eyes of a clown that does not know what his job really entails. I am a college student trying to find myself in my field, but it is hard when he does not agree or care about what I do. I hate him so much I feel like a punch would do him good for all the lip he has given me. Is that term lip still with the times or could it be that I am too mentally old? Hate is a strong word, but you cannot stop emotions from being expressed. I try to express it, but it gets shut down. You can only hold it in for so long before your emotions erupt and you find yourself a berserker.