Pain

The hurt that the characters feel when they get punched or when a crush breaks up with them. Not really the pain I am going to talk about. I recently acquired a bike today and to everyone's surprise I am not able to ride a bike. I got it during the end of trying today, but it still needs work. My feet are sore and I feel like a hundred nails were step on in the process. I also have some hurt in an area, which I cannot disclose. When I got rejected by some girls in my school I felt the pain, but not like this. I once walked in the snow when I know I am very sensitive to the cold to fix my PSP. I do not currently have that PSP with me because it got bricked. The term bricked is when you cannot do anything with your PSP except stare at it. Am I crazy to suffer this pain for a job I may not get yes, but I need money. I need money so I can be somewhat free in this unfree society. To break away from these lonely and sad chains called staying at my dad's house because my school is in the same state. Now if I compare today's pain with the pain of being where I am, I would stay being where I am is more painful. I like being alone as much as the next person, but just getting a human contact once in a while is great. To be able to kiss someone you like once or twice if you get that far. That is stuff I am missing out on. At this point I am a NET, not NEET because I am currently in college. I do not work and I do not have any communication with the outside world with physical interaction. That pains me the most. I am a soft speaker and when I adjust my voice even a little bit higher people think that I am screaming at them. Today I stared at the worker at McDonalds like she was my type when she wasn't. I could have talked to her, but after half a year of not talking to new people it is hard to strike up a conversation. If I can strike up a conversation it would be a fake version of me and not the real me. The pain of not being able to show yourself is the hardest of them all. Not being respected for being you is even harder. So how do we get over pain, we just wait till it heals. I am talking about all pains or you can try to get over the thing that causes you pain. We can run or we can attack, but like most otakus I am weak so I do not fight people. The pain of love is know what it is or not knowing and trying to find out what it is through confrontation.